I rode an elevator. Up, down, all around. With my therapist and by myself. Yet, I experienced no anxiety. This is good in the sense that I was able to do it and am actually looking forward to doing it again. This is bad in the sense that I didn't experience any anxiety so I was unable to practice feelings those sensations while with my therapist. I almost felt like I let him down. He told me to be sure that I give myself credit where credit is due. I did well and I should be proud of that.
I just want to bring on the anxiety!! This week I am going to take some medicine (because that makes me anxious) and then ride in the backseat of his car while he drives somewhere that I am unfamiliar with. Sounds awful to me, but I am looking forward to it.
It's a bust week for me and there are many anxiety provoking situations in my immediate future. My best friend is getting married next weekend, so I have to drive to the rehearsal dinner which means traffic on the beltway at 5:00 on a Thursday. I haven't sat in traffic for YEARS! I have been avoiding it longer than any other of my phobias. Should be interesting. I'll keep you posted on that.
Then, as the matron of honor, I have to walk down an aisle, stand in front of a bunch of strangers, and give a SPEECH at the reception. Luckily, the bride is a lovely, sweet lady so all of the attention will be on her regardless of how I am acting. But what if I panic? What if I totally freak out in front of everyone???? I would be mortified! I guess that is just the fear talking. What I should be thinking is that I look forward to the anxiety. I want this anxiety. I can do this....
I'll work on that attitude adjustment. Until then....
Here's to doing the unimaginable and doing it well!
9 years ago
My wife hates elevators too but she can tolerate them. However, she has developed a terrible flight anxiety. We were on a very bumpy flight 4 years ago. That flight triggered this anxiety. I try to reason with her that airplane travel is much safer than road travel. She accepts that argument but she still can't stop her anxiety. She agreed to fly last Summer despite her anxiety but now she is threatening never to get on an airplane ever again.
ReplyDeletePublic speaking anxiety is very common. Even though I am otherwise very anxiety-free, I tend to get nervous in anticipation of a speech. Please remember that most people feel that way. Be well-prepared. Practice your speech. Don't overpractice because that could worsen your anxiety and cause your mind to go blank. Be yourself. Remember that everyone there just want to hear your geniune feelings. Nobody is going to judge your public speech abilities. You'll find that your anxiety will disappear once you start talking. Good luck.
You're doing great! BABY steps...
ReplyDeleteAs far as the wedding goes... I agree with Stormy, try not to over analyze it too much, but definitely have it written down so as to bring you comfort and ease! You will do just FINE :) You're so strong and you don't even realize it! We trick ourselves into believing that we're not, and we really need to dig DEEP to find that old confidence we used to have.
Still thinking of you and praying for you!!! Can't wait to hear more...
Blessings,
Amy
Great comment on "Anxiety Girl"'s page...I followed up on it b/c I've been wanting to know the same things as you! I think you and I have some things in common, and I'm so glad I found you!
ReplyDeleteHope you got my email...when you have time, try and get back to me about your concerns that you described on AG's page!
Talk to you soon!
Amy